It is no secret that being a Mom is damn hard. I have managed to keep a kid alive and
(relatively) unscathed now for 4 years.
Honestly, there are times I think this achievement warrants a parade hosted
by Al Roker (the jolly plump Al Roker and not the skinny creepy Al Roker)….ok,
or maybe just a bottle of wine, a massage and a chance to read my kindle
without locking myself in the bathroom.
The early days with Kennedy were rough.
She didn’t sleep…like, at all. It
was brutal. One of my saving graces was
meeting a group of amazing women who also had babies the same age as my
screaming/shitting/up all night bundle of joy.
4 years later and we are still thick as thieves.
I cannot tell you how important these women have been to me. As a mother you need someone to call when you
are ready to throw your kid out the window.
A friend that knows the appropriate response to that call is to drop by
with wine and chocolate…and not knock on the door with CPS. I love my non-mom friends, but there is only
so much snot/shit/breast feeding talk they can take. Especially my gays. There is nothing worse that following-up
their hot “drunk making out with a drag queen” story with your tale of leaking
breast milk through your shirt in line at Target…where you may or may not have
been buying hemorrhoid cream (BTW just goggled hemorrhoid to see how to spell
it. DO NOT do a Google image search…you
cannot unsee that shit, yikes!). You may
think that your husband/partner/baby daddy can fill those shoes, but I am
telling you from experience that he cannot.
Listen, I know it is hard to imagine, but at some point you may want to
have sex with this person again. Why not
let someone else be your outlet for all of that saggy boob and vaginal dryness
chit-chat? Trust me; your marriage will
be better for it.
Finding these Mom friends is way harder that one would think. In my experience, Moms (especially new Moms)
tend to put on a front and are reluctant to admit that sometimes being a Mom is
swallowing them whole. Visit a playgroup
and you will drown in “I only feed organic”…”I have been on a preschool
wait-list since conception”…”my 3 day old can read and is fluent in Chinese”. Ladies, ladies, why the competition? You cannot honestly tell me that you rolled
out of bed from that drunken sexy-time with your hubby to dial the local A-list
Montessori preschool. It just did not happen and if it did, honestly
I am really worried.
Finding quality Mom friends is hard and takes an excessive
vetting process, but it is so worth it. It
takes a village. Build one with women
who you can be yourself around. I thank
my Mommy friends for sharing this journey with me. We say it all the time, but we are better
Mothers because we have each other to lean on.
My wish is that every Mom out there has the
same support system.
